April 11, 2024

J - Job (New Job)


Theme: Grief Work and Healing Journey

I started a full-time job in June, three months after my mom passed away. Before then, I was a stay-at-home writer, fully disabled under the law. However, living on my own required me to get a job in order to survive.

I applied to more jobs than I can tell you and interviewed for a few that ended up not being right for my needs. The job I landed was actually advertised in a local Facebook group my sister is a member of. She sent me the post. I contacted the person who advertised the job, got an interview with the owner, vice president and general manager, and got confirmation two hours later that the job was mine. 

Although I will not say where I work for obvious Internet safety reasons, I will say that I am in an administrative role. I really like my job. It's easy, but there's still challenges to keep it from being boring. At the same time, there's lulls where I get to write.

Usually around 1:00pm, things calm down to a relative screeching halt. Of course, some days can be more hectic than others, and occasionally, there are days where even the morning hours are uneventful. Sometimes, if I'm in the office by myself and run the entire shop alone, which happens every Friday, it can be busy until about an hour and a half before I can leave for the day. Or it can be calm...and boring.

I'm super thankful to have a job that allows me time to write. And I've written MANY words and worked on countless works-in-progress while at work. In fact, I am working on this blog post at work. It is 11:28am right now on January 29th, 2024. I had a busy morning, but now I have free time, so thank you, blog and blogging friends, for helping me to look busy. LOL

My job gives me something to do. A distraction.

When I was first learning about grief work, I heard that seeking constant distractions and working too much halts the healing process. The three months after my mom passed away, before I got my job, I had definitely sought out distractions. I had cleaned and organized and redecorated my entire house, did yard work, ran errands, basically did this and that to keep my mind occupied, because when I was not occupied, the sadness, the loneliness, the worry, the EVERYTHING would flood on in, and I'd cry. A lot. For a long time. I honestly didn't know how I'd get through that.

I was not writing at the time. It was too hard. So, I didn't have my stories or my characters to distract me.

My job does give me a daily distraction, but one that has helped me to move forward and live without my mom. 

I'm okay on the weekends when I'm off from work. Three-day weekends are good, too. I love three-day weekends when they happen.

Now, four days in a row off because of holidays? Well, that's a different story. When that happened twice last year, both times, the fourth day had been a bit rough. I pretty much spent the holidays alone, which was fine, but on the fourth day, boredom would strike. Following the boredom would come loneliness. Right on its heels would waltz in sadness, and then I'd be missing my mom and in a pit of despair.

Four-day weekends I could do without right now, but that won't always be the case. Eventually, four-day weekends will be fine. Eventually, I won't feel the stab of loneliness. Maybe because I won't be alone. Who knows?

What I do know at the moment is that my job has helped me to stay in my home with my kitties, has given me security and something to do aside from writing, and has also kept me out of depression's depths. I've been there before, feared it after my mom passed away because I was back there again, and don't want to return to where I'd been before with depression.

So, yes, my job helped me with my grief.



B - Beach

C - Church

D - Donating

E - Epistle (Letter from Heaven)

F - Facebook Posts

G - Grief Share

H - Haiku Poetry

I - Imari

J - Job (New Job)


  1. Working outside the home has many benefits. I'm glad it's worked out for you. I'm at a stage where I would like to spend more time at home writing, but it doesn't pay the bills, so...one we go.

    1. I wish I could spend more time writing, as long as that loneliness stays at bay.

  2. Sounds like the perfect job for you. And the fact that you get to write during slow times, wow. You can't ask for anything better than that.

  3. I'm glad you got a job that keeps you from getting depressed. I think Mummy works hard at not getting depressed because she's not been well since this time last year. She's better when she has things to do. And also when she can get out for a walk, however short it is compared with what she used to do.
    But she still looks after us, and we try to give her lots of distractions.
    Locksley (a guinea pig)

    1. Getting out of the house for a little walk always helps.

  4. Sometimes getting out of the house for a job is a good thing. I'm glad you found a job you enjoy.

  5. Congrats on the job! Besides the income, work can be so grounding.

  6. I could easily spend all my time not working but I still need the income on top of my pension. Also, my partner is profoundly depressed at the moment and although the days (2.5) I go to work are always bad for her - in truth all days are bad and so we both agree that it is a good thing for me to have an outside life...
    Mine is also an admin role - I used to be titled General Manager but the company has grown in size and personnel and with me being part-time that doesn't quite make sense so i am very General and still a Manager but I mostly do the bits nobody else has time or space (or inclination) to do like HACCP. I don't get time to do my own writing at work like you, but I will sneak a look at notifications...

    1. Loved ones of those who are dealing with depression do need time out of the house for their own well-being, too. Hang in there!

  7. It's nice that your new job can pay the bills, provide a distraction, and give you some writing time.

    Ronel visiting for J: My Languishing TBR: J