Click the image to explore the Disaster Crimes series.

NOTICE:


DISCLOSURE:

This site uses affiliate links for Bookshop.org, an online marketplace that supports independent bookstores. Chrys Fey will earn a commission if you click through and make a purchase.

October 17, 2016

You Might Be A Bully If...


Let’s stop the bullies.  Bullying doesn't just occur with children and teenagers but with adults, too. If you see someone doing these things, say something. If you’re a kid, notify an adult.


You Might Be a Bully If…

- You use social media, emails, texts, and phone calls to harass someone.

- You get into a dispute with someone on Facebook and continue to go to the conversation (on someone else’s post) to issue more attacks and taunt them for not responding.

- You post rants on social media and keep adding insults about someone in the comment section, especially if he/she can see it.

- You use people’s pasts or insecurities as insults against them.

- No matter what someone does to improve their life or themselves, you don’t stop making fun of them.

- You purposefully seek someone out to poke fun at them.

- You make fun of someone for how they look and the clothes they wear.

-
The only way for you to feel better yourself and your life is to put others down.


- You physically and verbally attack someone for being different.

- You use someone’s sexual orientation, race, or religion as a reason to torment them.

- You don’t stop bothering someone even after they ask you to leave them alone.

- You make people cry and you laugh at their tears.

- You target people smaller and weaker than you.

- Your taunts force someone to take drastic measures. (Move, transfer to a new school, quit their job, or harm themselves.)

- You’re reading this and thinking “Eff you…”, “That’s stupid…”, or “This is BS.”


STOP BULLYING!



If some of these things sound like you, make a vow to change today.



BLOGFEST!

Prompt: If I were a Mobster…
When? October 21st, 2016 
Where? On your blog!

For more info: If I were a Mobster Blogfest Sign Up





Sign up Linky List:



HALLOWEEN GIVEAWAY!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

64 comments:

Bish Denham said...

A timely post, Chrys!

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

Usually the bully is a miserable person who only feels better when putting others down.

Chrys Fey said...

Yes. I always like to post something about bullying during October.

Chrys Fey said...

You're right. That's the first pointer under the picture in my post. :)

Loni Townsend said...

"You make fun of someone for how they look and the clothes they wear." You know, this kinda hit home for me. Yesterday, I met up with my brother and his wife, along with my parents. We don't get together often, maybe once a month. I'm used to biting comments from my brother's wife, since she's been in the family for 16 years now. I have been dubbed "Crazy Aunt Loni" because I enjoy dying my hair unnatural colors. I'm caught in a mental trap. I know coloring my hair makes me stand out and draws attention. At the same time, I don't like being labeled as if I was the socially awkward family member to be avoided. I'm fairly sure it wasn't meant that way, but that was what it made me feel. My status with my brother's family is self-imposed because of my choice in hair color, but is thinking I brought this on myself akin to victim-blaming? Or is that the definition of bullying?

Pat Hatt said...

Yep, such people need to go pound sand. Just because they are miserable doesn't mean they have to make everyone else miserable.

Chrys Fey said...

We don't bring it upon ourselves for what we dye our hair or wear. We do it because it makes us happy. The people who make fun of us for it might have a different opinion, may not like it, or would never do it, but that doesn't give them the right to bully us or call us crazy. I was bullied in school for my shoes and even my nail polish color. It was bright green, and girls said it looked like fungus. I loved the color, but they made me feel ashamed I had it on. Not cool.

Chrys Fey said...

They can pound the sand, and we'll take a stand.

L. Diane Wolfe said...

Bullying is a pattern and there are so many ways to bully in the Internet age.

Christine Rains said...

Here, here! Great post.

Hilary Melton-Butcher said...

Hi Chrys .. or a man, siding with another man, and trying to bring down a woman - so often the case ... I'm a-fighting ... cheers Hilary

Joylene Nowell Butler said...

So true, Chrys. Not just children are bullies. They grow up to be adult bullies. They're in the news constantly. Which is rather sad because they get exactly what they want: attention for being a bully. Thank you for this important post.

cleemckenzie said...

The world has always had bullies, the problem now is they get so much press that you can't avoid them. Good post.

Misha Gerrick said...

I've been seeing a lot of bullying going around on my Facebook feed because of people's differing opinions on US Politics. I don't even think people realize they're doing it.

Elizabeth Seckman said...

As a little girl, I found myself in the cross hairs of a bully. I was very timid and easy to make cry. At the time, I hated it. But when I hit my teens years, I appreciated that in my history. It taught me to be more sensitive to the people around me.

Unknown said...

Bullies. What crappy people. Work on yourself. Don't tear someone else down, build yourself up. Making others feel worse will not make you feel better.

Chrys Fey said...

It's scary nowadays with the Internet.

Chrys Fey said...

Thanks, Christine! :)

Chrys Fey said...

Oh, yes. Sexism is definitely a form of bullying.

Chrys Fey said...

If something isn't done, they sure can grow up to be adult bullies. That's why the pattern needs to be broken. And parents as well as teachers are key in doing that.

Chrys Fey said...

Bullies are becoming more and more empowered. Now it's time for the victims to become empowered.

Chrys Fey said...

Politics is a bad area. Everyone thinks their views are right and whoever is against them is wrong. Even people who don't usually bully people commit political bullying.

Chrys Fey said...

I was a victim to bullies several times as a little girl and as a teen. Even as an adult. It's made me stronger. Bow I'm much more likely to speak up.

Chrys Fey said...

*applauds* Bullies tend to have low self-esteem. They really do need to build themselves up and grow as a person.

Janie Junebug said...

Good list, Chrys. I was bullied on Facebook. I had to block the person. I couldn't make a pleasant comment on someone else's post without her attacking me. I used to know her in person. She attacked me physically then. I never saw her again and never answered the phone when she called. She was much larger than I am. Bullying is horrible.

Love,
Janie

Carrie-Anne said...

I was bullied in junior high, mostly because people falsely thought I was a lesbian. All I said was that gays are just like any other people, and certain jerks assumed that could only mean I was gay myself. This was 1992–4, before gay rights had come as far as they have now. As an adult, I don't regret taking the stand I did, even though it cost me dearly.

In April, I became one of the targets of the infamous K i w i F a r m s pro-bullying, pro-stalking, pro-doxxing site, and I'm hoping my cyberstalker loses interest in me eventually. I won't write their name normally because I don't want to give them any further traffic or attract their attention. The people on that site have bullied and stalked some of their targets so badly, they've been driven to suicide. Even after these suicides, these bullies continue mocking them, like saying they're surprised a coffin was normally-sized instead of double-wide.

Chrys Fey said...

Bullying is horrible. I'm sorry you had to deal with that. Bullying can get very nasty on Facebook. I've seen it.

Chrys Fey said...

I'm proud of you having never wavering in your belief. Bath then, it was very hard to stand up for gay rights.

I don't believe you for not wanting them to gain any traffic. Typing out their name like that was smart.

That is truly horrible. I can't believe a site like that is still up.

diedre Knight said...

There will unfortunately always be mean people in the world. The internet has empowered them greatly. As have those who foolishly call that free speech. Halloween used to be so much fun...

Sheena-kay Graham said...

The last one was my favorite. Way to put bullies on blast Chrys (reverse psychology lives!). Indeed these people are sad empty individuals on the inside. I could not imagine dedicating my life to hurting others. Change is definitely needed.

Chrys Fey said...

I know. Bullies will always find a way and always exist. :(

Chrys Fey said...

The last one is my favorite, too. ;)

Change is greatly needed.

Diane Burton said...

Some people never mature. They may get older, but they're still repeating habits of a junior high or high school bully. I wish I had been brave enough to stand up to those who bullied me in junior high. (What an awful age.) Great post, Chrys.

Chrys Fey said...

Junior High was the time when I was bullied the most. It is an awful age.

Beverly Stowe McClure said...

In my opinion, bullies are really cowards. They sometimes pick on those weaker than themselves, kids or adults that won't fight back. Good subject.

Liz A. said...

They're doing an anti-bullying month in the school district I work for. This was very timely.

Chrys Fey said...

I think you're right.

Chrys Fey said...

October is National Bullying Awareness Month. :)

Melissa Sugar said...

Bullying is terrible and we all thought it was just for mean kids, but adults have used anonymity and the Internet to take bullying to a new a darker level. I'm glad to see you're focused on it this month. We are promoting anti-bullying and cyber bullying awareness workshops at my kids school this month. A bully, like many others have written, feels very insecure and threatened by others and the only way they can feel good about themself is to put others down. Too many victims are tormented and continue to suffer. I wonder if we will ever be able to stop it in the Internet age. At least more people are aware and more people feel comfortable reporting a bully when they come across one.

nashvillecats2 said...

Sadly I know only too well a fe bullies.....in my family. I have finally accepted they are a lost cause, but there is that tiny word hope still hidden in my mind.
Yvonne.

Neurotic Workaholic said...

I've seen bullying occur all the time on Twitter; people decide they don't like someone and go in nonstop online attack mode. For example, I don't like Trump any more than anyone else does, but I do think that some of the stuff that's been written about him is almost as nasty as the stuff that comes out of his mouth. Also, I must admit that were a couple times where I got into arguments with strangers on Twitter. I finally ended a brief disagreement about police officers with one particularly aggressive troll (and she was a professor in real life, though thankfully not one I knew) who tried to keep provoking me even after I stopped talking to her; she called me a "snowflake" and kept insulting me, because she wanted to remind me of how stupid she thought I was.

Chrys Fey said...

The Internet really makes it worse. It makes people feel more insecure and threatened than ever. And it allows people go say things they may never say in real life.

Chrys Fey said...

Family bullies are the worst. I've been bullied by family.

Chrys Fey said...

Social media is a breeding ground for bullies. Current events, especially about the election, race, or police officers, has brought about many nasty agreements on social media.

Denise said...

And I thought you were doing a post about the Republican candidate for President.

Chrys Fey said...

Ha! No, I don't blog about politics. I don't even like to state my views or who I'm voting for on social media.

Mary Kirkland said...

Oh definitely. I hate bullies and always say something if I see someone acting like one. My brother is a bully and thinks it's funny to trash talk my friends on fb so when he wouldn't stop even when I asked...I put him on my 'restricted list' so now he can only see the posts that I make public.

Lynda R Young as Elle Cardy said...

Awesome post. Many bullies don't even realise they are bullies.

emaginette said...

To me any hater is a bully. Spread love and acceptance everyone. :-)

Anna from elements of emaginette

Chrys Fey said...

Love and acceptance is what this world needs.

Chrys Fey said...

I think that can be true. Anyone be a bully, even if for a moment.

Chrys Fey said...

I've experienced bullying from family on FB. I've blocked them from being able to send me FB messages.

Lisa Thomson said...

Such an important post, Chrys. Inspired by the latest in politics? Maybe not, but this is always a timely topic. Thanks for sharing this.

Denise Covey said...

Thankfully Chrys, I can say I"m not and never have been a bully, but I've seen plenty in my time!

Nicola said...

A poignant post, Chrys.

BTW: I'm really enjoying Seismic Crimes at the moment :)

Anonymous said...

I think, online especially, people forget there's a person on the other side of the screen.

Jeffrey Scott said...

Uh oh, you said, "Rant on social media." I better be careful.
Seriously though, great thoughts. I like your last point.

Chrys Fey said...

I wrote this last year. I always try to do a bullying post in October to help spread awareness.

Chrys Fey said...

That's good, Denise!

Chrys Fey said...

Awesome! That makes me so happy. I can't wait to read your review when you're done. :D

Chrys Fey said...

I think that's probably easy to forget. The Internet can be so impersonal.

Chrys Fey said...

Ha! But your rants are different. ;)

J.H. Moncrieff said...

Oh no! I hope this post wasn't inspired by anything going on in your life, Chrys. :(

I managed to mostly escape bullying as a kid (except for one regrettable moment in junior high) but I've had bullying coworkers and bosses as an adult. In both cases, I quit my job. It's sad that bullies thrive in the corporate environment, often becoming directors and CEOs.

Chrys Fey said...

At the time I wrote this, it was àbout some people I know who don't realize they're bullies.

How horrible that bullying made you quit your jobs.