Oh, For Shifts’ Sake!

No, that is not a typo in the title.

I am going through massive shifts in my life, in my career, and in myself.

Frankly, it’s scary.

These shifts started last year with some major eye-opening situations in both my professional life and personal life.

Life Shift:

December 2021, my mom was diagnosed with inoperable stage 3-B lung cancer. (She was never a smoker.) I was driving home the night of November 28th after my mom was admitted into the hospital and there was Christmas music on the radio. Every song I heard during those two days she was in the hospital made me cry. Christmas stopped being happy. Christmas music did not bring me joy. 

Fortunately, she came home the next day.

My mom is going through once-a-week chemo treatments and five-days-a-week radiation treatments. Her treatments started in January and will last six weeks in all. I am bringing her to all of her treatments and caring for her.

Her last chemo treatment is on Valentine's Day.

Career Shift:

The day my mom had a biopsy done, I received a rejection that broke me.

Background: In 2020, I submitted to an independent publisher (who shall remain nameless) that rejected my story, but one of the line editors gave me feedback that I used—with the help of an amazing critique partner—to make my story better. I was invited to resubmit in six months. 

April 2021, I resubmitted. 

In June, I received an update from the assistant publisher asking me if they could have more time reviewing my submission. Of course, I granted them more time and my hopes rose, but months went by and no response. Come October (six months after I resubmitted), I started to query agents again. 

Then on the day my mom had her biopsy and got her official staging diagnosis and it was confirmed she has cancer (eight months after I resubmitted), I got the rejection from the publisher. A form rejection. After all that. After resubmitting and them asking for more time, I got a form rejection, and on the worst day possible. 

I Donated My Hair / Good Causes PART 3

Please Note: This post is pre-scheduled. I’m caring for a loved one receiving treatments, so my replies to comments and return visits to bloggers will be delayed. I will get to it eventually, though. Promise. Thanks for your understanding!

Good Causes:

Causes and Donations - Books, Animals, and People / PART 1

Good Causes to Support / PART 2

Every New Year, I like to cut several inches off my hair to shed the old. With long hair, it’s easy to do this, but even a trim for other lengths could be symbolic. Plus, it keeps your hair healthy.

I like having long hair. Really long hair. For me, it’s an insecurity thing. My long hair has been my security blanket. My shield. It physically covers up my body insecurities…my neck and back from my spinal deformities (scoliosis and other related issues). That’s why my plan was to keep my long hair, cut off several inches, let it regrow throughout the year, and repeat every New Year’s Day.

However, my mom was diagnosed with Stage 3-B lung cancer (non small cell adenocarcinoma) in December. (No, she’s never smoked.) She started chemo and radiation therapy in January. 

Before she started treatment, we were told she’d lose her hair.

But even before all that, my mom kept dropping hints about how she liked my hair short.

In the past, whenever I cut my hair, I tended to cut it above my shoulders for a new look and feel. And I do like how I look with short hair, but my insecurities have stopped me from cutting it that short in many years.

Then my mom was diagnosed and we prepared for her to lose her hair. That’s when I decided to cut my hair short in support of her and to donate my hair in honor of her.

Here’s the before and after:

Year of Yes / Books for Writers

Please Note: This post is pre-scheduled. I’m caring for a loved one receiving treatments, so my replies to comments and return visits to bloggers will be delayed. I will get to it eventually, though. Promise. Thanks for your understanding!

This year I am bringing back my Books for Writers feature. This will be a once-a-month feature.

I did this once before in 2017.

The books I talked about in 2017:

The Grammar Bible

Guerilla Marketing for Writers

Writer’s Market

Bird by Bird

Feng Shui for Writers

The Complete Guide to Self-Publishing

Your One Word

The Artist’s Way

Children’s Writer’s Word Book

YEAR OF YES BY SHONDA RHIMES

BLURB & BUY @ BOOKSHOP

While this book isn’t exactly for writers, writers can benefit from it.

You can read Year of Yes for the reading challenge for writers I’m hosting called Read With Fey. You can join it on The StoryGraph here. But you don’t have to be on The StoryGraph to participate! Check out all the details here: Read With Fey: Challenge For Writers

A Look Back At My 2021 Reading Challenges

Please Note: This post is pre-scheduled. I’m caring for a loved one receiving treatments, so my replies to comments and return visits to bloggers will be delayed. I will get to it eventually, though. Promise. Thanks for your understanding! And prayers and healing vibes for positive results to the treatments would be much appreciated. ❤️

In my last blog post I celebrated 10 years blogging and announced a reading challenge for writers that I am hosting called Read With Fey. You can join it on The StoryGraph here. But you don’t have to be on The StoryGraph to participate! Check out all the details here: Read With Fey: Challenge For Writers

I love reading challenges!

Last year (2021), I participated in FOUR different reading challenges. The most I've ever decided to participate in, and I joined them at all different times throughout the year. Because I participated in so many, I wanted to highlight them and the books I read in a post. I'll share them here in the order of when I joined them.

I hope you enjoy viewing my 2021 reads/challenges.

GOODREADS CHALLENGE:

I set a Goodreads goal to read 30 books. Thanks to graphic novels, short books (middle grade and YA), and picture books, I exceeded this goal. I read 95 books.

REMINDER: All reading counts as reading. Graphic novels are real books. Picture books are real books. Reading graphic novels, short reads, and picture books certainly do count toward reading challenges. Don't let anyone tell you that only novels of 300+ pages count. All reading is valid.

You can view my Goodreads challenge here.

***

ALPHABET BOOK CHALLENGE:

HOSTED BY @FABLESANDWREN AND

@STARLIGHTBOOKTALES ON INSTAGRAM

THE GOAL: Read a book that starts with each letter of the alphabet (J, V, X, Z had to be somewhere in the title to count). There were also a few extra challenges like: a color in the title, one-word title, starts with the same letter of your first name, and #, which I took to mean a number in the title/subtitle.

Here’s my completed graphic we were given to use to share our progress to our Instagram stories:

THE BOOKS I READ:

Read With Fey: Challenge For Writers + 10 Years Blogging!!!

Please Note: This post is pre-scheduled. For the next couple of months, I’ll be caring for a loved one receiving treatments, so my replies to comments and return visits to bloggers will be delayed. I'm even behind on December's and November's comments. So sorry! I will work on those today and ones that come in for this post when I'm able. Thanks for your understanding! And prayers and healing vibes for positive results to the treatments would be much appreciated. ❤️

READ WITH FEY: CHALLENGE FOR  WRITERS

Created by me (Chrys Fey), the Read With Fey challenge is for writers at all levels. The goal is to read *10 non-fiction books for writers during 2022.

Challenge Starts: January 1, 2022

Challenge Ends: December 31, 2022

Goal: Read *10 books for writers by the end of the year.

*Are 10 books too many? Set your own goal!

Just because I’ll be aiming to read 10 books doesn’t mean you have to!

However many books you read is an accomplishment.

Why Should You Join?

Every book you read could inspire you, educate you, and give you SPARKS. And you can read at your own pace.

Why Else Should You Join?

Every book you read for the Read With Fey challenge can count toward your personal reading goals.

Which Books?

Any books for writers! The books can be about marketing, publishing, the craft of writing, basically any non-fiction book that’d be useful to you as a writer. All formats (eBook, print, audio), re-reads, library borrows. It all counts!

For ideas on what to read, check out my Books for Writers list on Bookshop.org by clicking here.

How To Join:

There is no formal sign-up form, so ANYONE, ANYWHERE, and at ANYTIME can join in WHATEVER way they choose.

You can, however, join the Read With Fey challenge on The StoryGraph here to track your progress.

Or you can make a Goodreads shelf for the challenge, a spreadsheet on your computer, a checklist in your journal, a blog post(s), or whatever you want to do. This challenge is flexible for YOU. 

However you decide to do this challenge, please consider announcing your participation on social media as a post or story, tweet, blog post, YouTube video, etc. If you do, a link back to this post would be much appreciated.

Hashtags for social media: #ReadWithFey #ReadWithFey2022

The StoryGraph: Because reading challenges on The StoryGraph only work right now with prompts and not a set number, I created three optional bonus challenge prompts. These bonus prompts DO NOT have to be completed, but to help you add any and all books you read to the challenge on The StoryGraph, I made a bonus prompt called “Use This Bonus Prompt For ANY Book For Writers.” You can use it multiple times, even to add all of your reads if you have to. By reading one book per bonus prompt (three books total), you will technically have the challenge on The StoryGraph completed. lol

To add a book to your challenge, first mark the book as read with a date for 2022. Then on the book’s page on The StoryGraph, scroll down until you see “Add to Reading Challenges” on the left sidebar. If you joined Read With Fey, you’ll see it listed there. Click on it and then select the bonus prompt that qualifies. Only select one.

I’ve never hosted a reading challenge on The StoryGraph before. There was a bit of a learning curve, and I hope they’ll make a set number goal as an option in the future, so I’ll see how I like it. 🙂

Click here to join the Read With Fey challenge on The StoryGraph.

Click here to check out my Books For Writers list on BookShop.org.

Best of Write with Fey 2021 (& 2020)

BEST OF WRITE WITH FEY 2021:

For Writers:

10 Things All Authors Should Know

Writing About Minor Characters Who Are People of Color / Vlog

Traditional Publishing - Pros and Cons / Vlog

A Better Alternative to Goodreads - The StoryGraph 

Don't Shame Readers for What They Read (or Writers for What They Write)

Interviews:

Dear Publishers Interview / Jess Lee Talks About Diversity, Equity, Inclusivity, and Antiracism in the Publishing Industry

Ad Astra Interview / Olivia and Fiona Discuss Banned Books and Intersectional Feminism

Interview with Esme Brett, Creator of #RomancestagramBall on Instagram  

Marketing/Promo:

What Happened When I Had a Free (Companion) eBook During My Blog Tour?

New Release Marketing Conclusions

Book Recommendations:

Diverse Children's Books and Adult Books on Anti-Racism

Graphic Novels, Picture Books, MG & YA Books, Adult Romance

Book Chat Fun - The Perks of Being a Wallflower

History:

Indigenous History Month / Florida & Seminole History

Windover, A 7,000-Year-Old Pond Cemetery / Research

Causes to Support:

How to Respect and Support Indigenous Peoples

Causes and Donations - Books, Animals, and People / PART 1

Good Causes to Support / PART 2

Other:

#WritersontheMoon 

Why did I write a story for Thorn in the Disaster Crimes series? 

Dear IWSGers - An Announcement

I realized I never did a "Best of" post for 2020, so here it is!

2020:

For Writers:

COVID-19 and Authors

Every Author's Path Is Their Own

Don't Make Light of Another Writer's Plight

Writers. Should. NOT. Tell. Other. Writers. What. Tense. Or. POV. To. Use. It's. NOT. Your. Choice.

Dear Author with No Reviews

Dear “I’m Still a Nobody” Author

Dialogue Advice / VLOG

Do I Need a Website / Vlog 

What Should You Know About the Writing Life? / Vlog

Bad Things Must Happen / Vlog

Marketing/Promo:

Paid Book Blitz Results

Depression/Burnout:

Write a Letter to Your Fear / Except from Keep Writing with Fey

How Tarot Cards Helped with my Depression

Other:

NOT INADEQUATE / A Post about Self-Defense and Abuse

Real-Life Memories in Flaming Crimes / Vlog

A Man Like Donovan / Vlog

Writing About Pregnancy and Intimacy in FROZEN CRIMES

Whom Would You Want To Be Stuck with During a Blizzard?

Why Did I Write a Prequel to 30 Seconds? / Vlog

5 Secrets about 30 Seconds / Vlog

5 Tropes about Mental Illness You Need to Stop Writing / Guest Post By Natalie Dale, MD / A Writer's Guide to Medicine

 

5 Tropes about Mental Illness You Need to Stop Writing

 

By Natalie Dale, MD

 

Tropes exist for a reason. They are familiar, comfortable, and can provide a shared vocabulary with readers. In a skilled writers’ hands, tropes can be deployed or subverted in unique and original ways. But when it comes to mental illness, there are a few tropes that, even in skilled hands, have the potential to be quite damaging. This list is by no means exhaustive–I didn’t even begin to touch on tropes regarding specific conditions, such as ADHD, Autism, OCD, Schizophrenia, and Tourette’s–but it contains some of the most damaging and prevalent tropes regarding mental illness. In this post, we’ll discuss five prevalent tropes regarding mental illness and how to avoid them in your writing.

5)   Evil ECT

“Just lie here, bite down on this strap while I stick these electrodes to your head.”

 

“But I don’t want–”

 

“I promise it won’t hurt a bit.”

 

*Flips switch* *muffled screams*

 

In this trope, a character is strapped onto a table, electrodes placed on their head. Without warning or consent, electricity floods through them. Their limbs jerk and they grimace or cry out in pain. It’s horrifying to watch or read about. And it’s not how ECT works, at least not anymore.

 

Electroconvulsive therapy, or ECT, is a procedure that uses electricity to treat serious mental illnesses, ranging from treatment-resistant depression to catatonia. It is an incredibly effective treatment that can alleviate symptoms in as little as six sessions, or about three weeks. By comparison, most medications for depression take at least six weeks to take effect.

 

The stigma surrounding ECT comes from the early days of the procedure, when higher doses of electricity were used, and without anesthesia. Back then, side effects could include everything from permanent memory loss to fractured bones due to the incredible strength of the convulsions caused by the high voltage. Invented in the 1930s, the procedure as it was performed back then was barbaric at best. Then again, during that same time, doctors were touting cigarettes as a “healthy choice.” Medicine has come a long way since then.       

 

Nowadays, people receiving ECT do so under general anesthesia, as they would for a surgical procedure. They’ll be given a muscle relaxant to minimize convulsions, a mouth guard to prevent them from biting their tongue, and supplemental oxygen through a face mask. Throughout the procedure, their blood pressure, heart rate, breathing rate, and blood oxygen levels are closely monitored. The electrical activity of the brain is also measured using an electroencephalogram, or EEG.